Fuck Valentines Day!

IMAG7059 I dread this stupid holiday every year, its so annoying. I have no problem being single and have been for the past 7 years but this holiday just pisses me off. (picture on the right is my pic, saw some others on FB and decided to do my own version 😀 )

In fact for a few years I have been getting my daughter something for Valentines Day and I purchase myself a small stuffed animal every year. Plus she would make something on her own for me or something from school.

But this year though Im kind of over it, dont want the clutter because Im moving to AZ and my daughter told me she doesnt need anything for Valentines Day neither especially since she is older now. So we decided to bake chocolate cupcakes with pink frosting and tonight watch Kung Fu Panda because we are going to watch Kung Fu Panda 3 in the theaters next week.

I remember my prior years being in relationships, once my (ex)husband bought me a Nike track suit for Valentines Day, I was like WTF really?? I was around 19/20 years old and I wanted the usual candy, flowers etc…when we lived in Mexico he barely serenaded me (we lived in the land of guitars and he was a musician who got paid to do serenades) . I cant remember if it was for my birthday or valentines day but he was resistant to do it but happily did it for his mother. Can you feel the love?? Now though I think the Nike track suit was a good idea and way worth more than some stupid candy and flowers.

My next relationship I feel like I was appreciated a lot more and was given flowers, candy the whole nine yards but at the end of it….it was a terrible time for me, a very bad mourning period because I was blindsided with the breakup.  6 months of therapy and anti-depressants for a few years cleared that up.

Ive only been in two serious relationships, slept with less than 10 people in my life and Im 34. I choose to be abstinent and use sex toys, its safer and a lot less drama. Plus I read somewhere that having casual sex is damaging to your soul and I believe it. Not exactly those words but I dont think we were meant to have multiple partners. Its like giving part of yourself away and for what? For bad sex and someone who doesnt give a shit.

IMAG7083This year and part of last year I have been somewhat persuaded by men and a woman. Im not used to it so I have my repellent and I feel like I have 3 brick walls up because of my past relationships. I also see no sense in getting involved also since I am moving out of state. There is one person I feel kind of connected to but again I see no point, Im moving. Moving takes 1st Priority, I have waited for this for YEARS. Im ready to move forward not backward.

This post is so honest it kind of makes me ill, but I always tell myself I have to express my honest thoughts and opinions about something if I am going to blog.

But I dont want to get involved with anyone anyway, I have my daughter to protect and she will be going into high school soon, that the most vulnerable and impressionable time for her. She will always be my baby and very 1st priority over any man. She is my valentine 😀 and the love of my life. Im so grateful to have her. The best gift my ex ever gave me, her and an experience of a lifetime living in Mexico.

Well we baked cupcakes, I made my daughter do most of the work…she has to learn sometime, plus it was the boxed cake and shes 12….she loved the mix, I let her eat a little and told her no more it can make her sick…we agreed on chocolate cupcakes with pink frosting (she loves chocolate and who doesnt and I love pink and its V Day win-win and compromise)…then we will start Kung Fu Panda on Netflix since we will be watching Kung Fu Panda 3 in the theaters…tomorrow we’ll watch #2 then after I will finish up this blog post and watch Burn Notice on Netflix.

Valentines Day I think is no only about love but about all love, love of children, family and friends, the whole couples love commercialized bullshit is what ruins the holiday for me and people forget its a pagan holiday too like most, but I think everything is just sorta blended in now and nothing matters, traditions you know?

Tomorrow though we are definitely taking advantage of Single Awareness Day and 50% off Valentines day candy as well. Looks like a win-win-win to me 😀 Next year I will think of something just as creative to do. Looks like I survived another Valentines Day. Whew! 🙂